


Let Me Protect Your Flame

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: BixFreed [18]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Promises, Protectiveness, Serious Injuries, Souls
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-19 00:37:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17591435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: Freed had always seemed like a candle to Bickslow, shining as brightly as a candle that had been split in half and lit at both ends and threatening to burn out just as quickly.





	Let Me Protect Your Flame

    Bickslow had been walking around the perimeter of the campsite, not that it was necessary with the Dolls strung out around the edge, their gaze focused outwards although more than once he had caught them turning to glance at his companion. He was just as guilty of that though, and he was just turning to take another look when he heard a muffled groan. At once all thoughts of keeping watch, and the potential of pursuit that had kept him on edge all evening was forgotten as he hurried across to the small fire, dropping to his knees beside Freed, just in time to see the beautiful sight of his partner’s eyes creeping open. “Freed,” he murmured, careful to keep his voice low, as he had learned the hard way not to startle the other man when he was in this state. There was a brief moment of tension, but there was no familiar flare of purple as Freed blinked slowly, before tilting his head to look at him, moving sluggishly as though he was still half asleep. And maybe he was, as his gaze lacked its usual clarity and focus.

“Bickslow…”

“How are you feeling?” Bickslow demanded.

“Better…” Freed didn’t sound too sure, and Bickslow caught the wince that followed as Freed shifted, trying to take stock, and not for the first time he wished that he had healing magic. Evergreen had gone for help, but they were in the middle of nowhere, and it was going to take time for her to return. Until then he would have to do what he could, and pray that they were discovered, and… Freed was moving, struggling to push off Bickslow’s cloak which had been keeping the worst of the chill away from him, and then lifting himself on trembling arms until he was sat upright.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“We…need…to…move.” The broken words forced out as Freed tried to push himself upright told Bickslow everything he needed to know about the other’s condition. As did the stubborn efforts to rise, with Freed managing to lift himself a few centimetres before falling back, the trembling in his arms worse than ever and with a growl he moved forwards, determined to stop the idiot before he could hurt himself further.

“Not yet,” Bickslow ordered, pushing Freed back down, hating how easy it was, because despite the differences in their size he knew better than anyone how strong his partner was. “Freed, look at yourself! You can barely stand, let alone think about walking out of here.” The words weren’t enough, they never were. Freed didn’t care about his limitations, or rather he refused to see them when he thought that it would put others in danger. When it put Bickslow in danger.

“I…”

“You are not fine!” Bickslow cut him off, already knowing what his partner had been about to say. It was the same thing he always said when he was injured, the same reassurance that they had long since learnt to take with a pinch of salt. “Freed.” Now he tightened his grip, realising that Freed was swaying, and what little colour he’d managed to regain while resting was draining away, and mindful of the bandages hidden beneath his clothes, he pulled Freed closer. “Freed, you need to let me take care of you this time.” There was no argument, but he wasn’t sure whether that was because Freed agreed, or because he just lacked the strength to argue at the moment, and as he felt more of Freed’s weight coming to rest against him, he had a feeling that it was the latter.

    He stayed like that for a few minutes, selfishly needing the comfort of having Freed alive and warm in his arms after how close they had come to losing him that morning, even though he knew that the position couldn’t be that comfortable for Freed. However, eventually, they had to move, if only so that he could check that Freed hadn’t injured himself further with his efforts, and it was only as he began to ease the Rune Mage back down, that he realised how badly he was trembling. _I could have lost him._  It was a thought that he had frantically been trying to keep at bay all day, and it had worked while he’d had to focus on getting Freed to safety, and then keeping watch, but now there was nothing to distract him from how close it had been. Especially as he gazed down into Freed’s pale face, unsurprised to find that he passed out again, lines of pain slipping through now that he could no longer control his expression. “Idiot,” he murmured without heat, brushing his fingers against Freed’s cheek before settling back on his haunches and watching over the other man as he slept.

    It was quiet, even the dolls were silent, their eyes glowing in the night as they kept watch over their family, and he knew that no one would get close without a fight. That was why after a brief hesitation, he reached up and flipped up the visor of his helmet, something he was still reluctant to do more than necessary even though Freed had never flinched away from his magic, and what he could do. However, tonight he needed that magic, taking a deep breath as he let his gaze, unfiltered by the visor land on his partner. He could feel the pull, the urge to control, to command that came from his magic whenever he saw another person’s soul, but it was easily kept at bay these days, and instead he blinked, long and slow as he stared at the beautiful flicker of gold, purple and darkest black that made up Freed’s soul.

    Freed had always seemed like a candle to Bickslow, even before he had got his first glimpse at the man’s soul, and despite the darkness that bled through from his demonic side, it was a bright light. Bright, and beautiful and oh so strong, even when Freed was laid low like this, it blazed like nothing else Bickslow had ever seen, and it was terrifying in its brightness. Because it seemed to Bickslow like a candle that had been split in half, burning at both ends, casting the brightest of lights, but also promising to burn out twice as fast. He saw that in the way that Freed was always pushing himself to the limits and beyond to keep the Raijinshuu together and safe, to protect Laxus, and he knew that when he was in danger, those limits disappeared entirely. As they had today when white magic had rendered him blind and helpless, open to the blitzkrieg of attacks that had immediately been launched in his direction the moment his knees had hit the ground.

_It should be me lying there…_

    He remembered closing his eyes, waiting for the blow to land and the pain to come, praying that Evergreen and Freed would be able to handle the rest. Pleading with Freed to forgive him. But the pain had never come. Instead, there had been a snarl that had the hair on Bickslow’s arms standing on end, and he had opened his eyes just in time to see a transformed Freed spring in front of him, dark form lit up, and for a moment he had glowed as brightly as the sun. Then he had fallen, and for a terrifying moment Bickslow had thought that he was about to watch that candle splutter and die right in front of his eyes, and it had been close.

Too close.

     Because it had taken everything that Bickslow and Evergreen had to haul the Rune Mage to safety and hold off the attacks long enough to lose their pursuers long enough to do what they could for Freed’s injuries. Which was too little, and now here they were, separated, with Freed barely strong enough to sit up and pursuit no doubt searching for them even as he sat here.

_I won’t let you touch him again._

    It was a promise that he had made countless times over the last few years, more and more frequently as he grew closer to Freed, and got closer and closer to the flame. It was a promise that he had broken more times than he could count, and one that he was still working towards, because Freed… Freed couldn’t see his own flame or the danger in burning of both ends, or maybe he wouldn’t see because doing so would mean stepping back occasionally. Letting them take the fall, and he knew that Freed couldn’t allow that to happen, no matter how often they berated him for being reckless, or how often he wound up in the infirmary because of them. It didn’t matter what had happened, or what their roles in the mess had been, Freed would always reach out to them, calm and reassuring, saying the words, but never seeing that they needed more.

That Bickslow needed more.

“Freed,” he murmured, reaching out once more, hesitating for a moment before letting his fingers settle in green hair, smoothing it away his partner’s face. This close, Freed’s flame was blinding, singing to him like a siren song and he had to close his eyes for a moment, overwhelmed. “I wish that you could understand.” _I wish that you could see how much I need you,_ he added silently. He could say it now because Freed wasn’t awake to hear him because he knew that his partner didn’t understand, and possibly never would understand that Bickslow would rather see half that flame, or spend his time stumbling through the darkness if it meant the candle would last just a little longer.

     However, he knew Freed, and he knew that his partner would never change. Just as if he was honest, he would never want Freed to change, because then the flame would dim and darken in a completely different way. “I know that you can’t…” _No matter how much I wish you could,_ his fingers curled against Freed’s cheek again as he opened his eyes to study his partner, struck as always by how different he looked when he was resting, the softer part of his flame shining brightly. “So I will keep trying to protect you, and keep making sure your flame stays alive.”

_So, please don’t leave me behind._

 


End file.
